Thursday, April 12, 2012


Well, yesterday at 12 noon it was all of 39 degrees, today at 12:28 it's 60!!

That's not too unusual, unless of course  you consider the fact that we've had 80 degree weather already this year!!  Yes, 80 degrees in March, 39 degrees in April!!  We  have flowers that have bloomed, trees that have budded, berries that were already starting to bud out.....and last night it was all of 28 degrees!!!
It's already flooded twice this Spring, and now there is no rain in sight!

Hot/cold, wet/dry....hmmmmm, I do believe I understand what Mother Nature is going through!!

You see, I'm a middle aged woman and I understand the changes that take place in an older woman's life!  Mother Nature is going through MENOPAUSE!!

Yup, that explains it all.  The heat fluctuations, the wild swings in moisture, the  wondering what will happen next.  Yup, it's definitely Menopause!!

I actually feel sorry for the old girl.  I can totally relate to feeling as though you've been doused in hot pepper oil and then dropped in lava.  The feeling of your insides heating up, not burning like indigestion, but actually heating up, and that feeling spreading from the core of your body to your legs, your arms, you feet, your hands, you fingers, your toes.  Then, for no known reason, your skin feels as though it's been dipped in ice water, your skin moves of it's own accord, leaving a dense trail of  chill bumps that cause your nipples to tighten and your hair to move around like demented snakes!

No wonder we've been having thunderstorms, tornadoes and high winds.  I know it pisses me off when I have all of the above symptoms.  But of course I couldn't cause twisting winds to tear a 20 mile trail of destruction, but still, I can understand!  At different times in my life I have actually felt as though I could cause a 20 mile trail of destruction! (We are ALL lucky that I can't!!!)

Anyway, it seems that Mother Nature is having a mid life crisis of some type and we, the poor creatures that walk this earth, are paying for it!  Maybe she'll calm down soon......or maybe we should put in a call to Father Time and let him deal with it!!

Until next time, stay safe and be sure to let your loved ones know you love them.


Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Red, red, red.....

So, today is April 10 and there are 9 more days until my birthday!!!!  Yay me!!  NOT!

Anyway, today I'm going to give blood.  Not only is it a good thing to do, but maybe the Red Cross will quit calling every day!  For some reason they seem to think I should just install a tap and let them drain it at will.  I get  at least three calls a week from the Red Cross.  They've even called me the day after I gave a pint!!  WTH???  I'm beginning to think that I've created a monster!!

You see, I have "good blood" (don't ask me, I'm just quoting the lady at the RC)  and they WANT it!!!  YES, they are addicted to my "good blood".  Of course, the fact that they can get a pint from me in under 7 minutes doesn't hurt any.  NO, it's not that my blood is thin, it's that my veins are "good"  (once again, don't ask, I have no idea).

After getting three calls in one week from the blood suckers at the RC, I began to wonder if perhaps there was some blood hungry monster somewhere who could only be satisfied by MY blood!!  Perhaps it's all the spicy/sweet foods that I eat!  Maybe he/she has a sweet tooth (fang?) and craves this good old red blooded southern sugar addicts blood!!  Or maybe he/she is a Oriental blood sucker and, because I eat soooooo much Oriental food (the real stuff, not just the Americanized junk you get at China Gate) I remind him/her of the good old times in the Qin Dynasty!

Maybe I should eat more garlic??

Or maybe they are using my good old American blood, with it's liberal mix of Native American, Black, Irish and German, to create some Super Race of smart asses!!  Just imagine it, the world over run with wise cracking smart asses with huge vocabularies!!!  What a world that would be!!  You would have to watch every word you say lest you leave a huge opening for some sarcastic insult to be flung your way!!  Oh the horror, the horror!!!

Even worse than that, they could be using my blood to make some type of night dwelling hybrid that survives solely on dark chocolate, peanut butter, spicy food, sweet tea, classic rock and nicotine!!!  These dark entities would creep around your house searching for cigarettes and vinyl!!

Okay, enough of that!

Giving blood is a very important thing to do!  You could save a life!  You could save MY life (Stop laughing!  You know you'd miss me if I were gone!!)  Thousands of people need blood every day!  It's the only truly renewable resource we have!!! No matter how many times we give blood, these amazing bodies of ours will make more!

So, if you have a few minutes, you are a healthy person NOT on multiple medications and you are feeling charitable, contact your local Red Cross and donate!!

Until next time!